Step into the world of “Shoresy Quotes” and discover the unapologetic and often hilariously crude musings of this hockey legend. Brace yourself for pure, uncensored wisdom.
40 Shoresy Quotes and Captions
- “Hey bud, you look like a bag of milk that’s been left out in the sun for too long.”
- “Your mom’s so sweet, she could make sugar taste like lemons.”
- “If brains were dynamite, some people couldn’t blow their nose.”
- “You’re so slow, you could get lapped by a sloth on a coffee break.”
- “She’s so pretty, she could make a rose blush.”
- “I bet you couldn’t find your way out of a paper bag with a map and a flashlight.”
- “He’s as useful as a screen door on a submarine.”
- “You’re about as sharp as a marble, aren’t ya?”
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- “She’s got more issues than National Geographic, buddy.”
- “I’d say you’re dumber than a bag of hammers, but that wouldn’t be fair to the hammers.”
- “You’re as handy as a pocket on a shirt, pal.”
- “Well, aren’t you just as useful as a chocolate teapot?”
- “You move slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.”
- “Looks like someone’s brain is running on fumes.”
- “You’re as graceful as a bull in a china shop, aren’t ya?”
- “You’re so clumsy, you’d trip over a cordless phone.”
Shoresy’s Words
- “He’s got a face for radio and a voice for silent movies.”
- “You’re as sharp as a bowling ball, my friend.”
- “You’re so dense, light bends around you.”
- “If stupidity was a sport, you’d be a pro athlete.” – Shoresy quotes
- “She’s so dense, she thinks Sherlock Holmes is a housing development.”
- “You’ve got a face only a mother could love. And she’s being polite.”
- “You’re as subtle as a chainsaw in a library, buddy.”
- “He’s so dense, he could throw a shadow on the dark side of the moon.”
Shoresy Quotes and Captions
- “You’re slower than molasses in January, my friend.”
- “You’re as sharp as a marshmallow, pal.” – Shoresy quotes
- “I’ve seen rocks with more personality than you, bud.”
- “You’re like a dictionary, but all the pages are stuck together.”
- “You’re so dim, you make a nightlight look like a supernova.”
- “If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on earth.”
- “I’ve met door knobs with more brain cells than you, buddy.”
- “You’re as useful as a screen door on a submarine, bud.”
Shoresy Quotes and Captions
- “You’re slower than a snail on a treadmill, my friend.”
- “You’re so thick, you make oatmeal look runny.”
- “She’s so slow, she could get lapped by a glacier.”
- “You’re like a broken pencil – pointless.” – Shoresy quotes
- “You’re as bright as a black hole, buddy.”
- “You’re so slow, you’d lose a race against continental drift.”
- “You’re about as sharp as a bowling ball, pal.”
- “You’re so dim, you make the night look bright, my friend.”
Also Read: 40 Bull Durham Quotes: Discovering Life’s Wisdom